butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
