I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
