Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Come share oat with me in your robe
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
