Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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