walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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