oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
