He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
