Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
