I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
