yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
So much Jack, so little girl.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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