Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
