he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
