evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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