I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
