so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
