im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
