I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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