My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Randomize
