Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
