Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
