well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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