Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Randomize
