Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
