His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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