Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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