I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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