in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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