Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
