omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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