Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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