all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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