tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize