So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
