you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
