Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
