Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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