I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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