btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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