it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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