yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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