I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
