she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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