Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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