Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
So much rum. So many feels.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
