I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He? As in you personified your dick?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize