we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
