i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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