fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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