I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
