Christians are straight up FREAKS
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
