Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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