i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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